Happy Birthday Taylor Swift!

Look at you! Born yesterday back in the latest 80! Along with all the other Taylors: Lautner, Momsen, James...Taylor. And you named your latest album after it! Such talent and beauty!

Here in your honor are some late 80s-era terrible jokes:

1. Apartheid

2. Ewoks (That one is timeless.)

3. Kylie Minogue as a great singer. (She has since improved vocally.)

4. All these conspiracy theories and urban myths about viruses being created by a committee of scientists or shadowy world governments? Rubbish!
But mad cow disease was definitely caused by a meating of minds!
Science fact:
Back in the day, the cows were eating dead cows' brains in their mulch. If you eat human brains (or any brains, for that matter) it's a health risk you run, developing the human form of thingy. Bungee Spongee Encephaloppatty. Or CJD as it's known. Creuzfeld Yakking Disease. MOOOO!


5. Marty McFly walks into a bar. He moonwalks around, and causes a spitoon to fly into the air, covering Buford Tannen with its contents.

The punchline: One of the best scenes in Back to the Future 3, released next year! What a joke of an inferior movie compared to the two previous movies!

You're welcome! Happy Christmas, Taylor, you big sexy panties! And welcome back from outer space! 

Taylor