Phone call intercepted by Piers Morgan days before the Oscars

PHONE CALL BETWEEN ALL-ROUND HOLLYWOOD LEDGE JAN THOZOMAS AND UNLISTED NUMBER, 14:24 PST, FEBRUARY 27 2014


FROM THE COMPUTER FILES OF PIERS MORGAN

JAN THOZOMAS: Hello?

WOMAN: John?

JAN THOZOMAS: Hey Adele.

WOMAN: Where you now, John? Are you with that jumbo again?

JAN THOZOMAS: No! No.

WOMAN: You leave that plane alone. You hear me? 

JAN THOZOMAS: I'm not at the airstrip, Adele.

WOMAN: Where are you now? You home?

JAN THOZOMAS: That's right.
 
WOMAN: So you can't talk? Is that right?  

JAN THOZOMAS: Ummm Hmmm.

WOMAN: You can't talk?

JAN THOZOMAS: That's right.

WOMAN: When you gonna leave your wife, John? Huh?

JAN THOZOMAS: Hold on.

WOMAN: You tell me you love me, that we'll be married a year from now. You say that every year, John.

JAN THOZOMAS: Hold on. I'm just going into the bathroom.

WOMAN: You want me call back?

JAN THOZOMAS: No. No. I'm going in here for some privacy. [SIGHS.] 

WOMAN: So I still don't like how you abused that jumbo of yours.
  
JAN THOZOMAS: I didn't do anything to the plane.

WOMAN: I know what I saw, John. And if you don't want me to go public about what I saw, and what we got goin--

JAN THOZOMAS: Baby, you know I love you.

WOMAN: Why am I the only one who knows? 

JAN THOZOMAS: Look, Adele, please - I'll give you a shoutout at the ceremony if you just keep things quiet.

WOMAN: At the Oscars?

JAN THOZOMAS: I'll mention your name, believe me. 

WOMAN: You'll do that for me?


JAN THOZOMAS: Sure. You gonna be watching? I can't ever declare my love for the bird. You, I mean. In British slang. But you know I love you on the QTeeeeeee...

WOMAN: I'll be watching that show. [PAUSE.] John?

JAN THOZOMAS: Hmmm?

WOMAN: Are your eyes closed, and are you swaying in front of the bathroom mirror?

JAN THOZOMAS: Mmmmmmm...

WOMAN: Good. I love that. I love it when you do that.