The Best Night Clubs on the Planet

The Pirate's Lair, Umbogo

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If your thing is foam parties but you're low on funds, check out this Club's amazing free foam party nights!

They don't have an admission fee into the club. How do they manage that? Because they use a cheaper form of foam. Don't get too lost in that foam: The antibacterial medical foam that is used at more expensive clubs has been given the all-clear by the Hygiene Board. The Minister for Health, Waguku, has a lot of experience in all matters medical: At the age of five, he became the youngest Witch Doctor in the history of his extended family and friend network. That was twenty years ago, when he inherited the post from his father who - according to the Health Ministry's website - died of complications from a toe injury at the "Messianic Age of Christ": That's 33, fact fans!

The industrial foam that is employed here has been known to cause both seizures and immaculate pregnancy. The latter condition is believed to have occurred following antics that were made possible because the industrial foam acted as both a means of hiding a thirty second fling between a 27 year old miner and a 19 year old college student, and as a substrate for the seminal fluids that unintentionally entered another 19 year old woman who was dancing nearby with no knickers on. But don't cry for any of these party animals who have since passed away! The press attention garnered from the unlikely coupling has helped to nicely set up the little Aids orphan that was the result on the road to good health, with a promised lifetime's supply of generic anti retroviral medications, and a college fund, all thanks to his deceased parents' selling of their hilarious and tragic tale before they died!