Harem of Housewives of Alberta destroyed

A nest of housewives has been isolated and destroyed by a team of pest controllers outside of Edmonton in Canada. The housewives - who had fled to a cave when authorities learnt that they were conspiring to create a "reality spin-off" - were humanely put to sleep as gas was pumped into the cave - in an operation overseen by a member of PETA, who was standing by with a van, a large black plastic bag, and an incinerator. The recent, Huff Post aggregated PETA statistics indicate that members of the organisation are a qualified resource in such matters.

Authorities across the globe are keen to stamp out any potential instances of what a spokesman of Interpol described at a recent press conference as a "highly contagious franchise" before the fall season, when "resistance is lower and people are more amenable".

However, seasonal fluctuations on a global scale mean that a reality spin-off could be launched from any network, however local - even in regions that are so regressive, you shouldn't even joke about it.